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Divine intervention and/or incredible self-delusion and/or good strategy sent Brandon Hantz to Redemption Island on Survivor South Pacific, as Ben “Coach” Wade turned on his ally after Brandon shockingly gave up immunity during Tribal Council. That sends us into Sunday’s finale with Brandon facing off against Ozzy Lusth during the final Redemption Island duel, and Coach, Sophie Clarke, Albert Destrade, and Rick “Who?” Nelson as our final five. Before we get into the crazy events of the episode, a disclaimer: I let God write this recap, so no don’t even think of blaming me for anything you don’t like about it. Actually, Coach’s strategy of telling Brandon that he was voting him out because God told him to was pretty genius—except I’d bet Coach believes that 100 percent. It’s odd, isn’t it, how if you hear voices, you’re crazy, unless you say that voice is a higher power? First, at the duel, Edna didn’t almost beat Ozzy; the preview tried to get us to believe she’d defeat him, but of co...

The merge has arrived on Survivor Redemption Island, and with it, the show kicked back into high gear. After winning six consecutive challenges, Matt re-entered the game, joining the merged tribe—and then it voted him out immediately, thanks to his own stupidity. Post-merge, Matt had two solid options: stay with the alliance made up of his original tribe, the one that voted him out, or join with the other tribe and go after those who voted him out. Instead, he decided to “honor my God,” he said, by staying with his original tribe but telling Rob, the very person who orchestrated his ouster, that he was planning on turning against them. Rob was appalled by his “audacity” and “stupidity,” and said, “It just confirmed he can’t be trusted. … He can still be a good Christian guy—on Redemption Island,” Rob said. Yes, Redemption Island is back for round two! That was unexpected. Although Matt rejoined the game, the post-merge losers will be sent there to duel one another, with whoever is sti...